Zebrahead - Denver, CO 11.24.06 (A Concert Review)
Posted by Jonny X on November 26, 2006

Zebrahead - Denver, CO 11.24.06

Artist: Zebrahead w/Authority Zero, Tokyo Rose, & Patent Pending
Venue: The Bluebird Theater, Denver, CO
Date: 11.24.06

It’s been a few days more than three years ago that I wrote my last concert review for 411Mania, and oddly enough, the band I reviewed was Zebrahead. I figured it was time for some fresh content from Jonny X since recounting my experience working on Richard Pombo’s re-election campaign has proven more difficult to write than I initially thought, my comparison of punk rock and baseball is no longer topical (And, in re-reading it, doesn’t really make sense or have a clear direction), and my dissertation on strip clubs waits to be finished.

Additionally, I got a new job that grants me much less free time than my previous one. This one is actually, like, a career, which is a little scary. But I suppose that’s what I got a Master’s degree for in the first place. Plus, my previous job was simple administrative work which allowed my mind to wander and lent itself well to putting pen to page.

Hence, you get this. I have some time today before I drive out tomorrow for business, and I can bang out a concert review in about an hour. So, with that said, here we go…

I’ve seen Zebrahead about eight times in my life, and they’ve never failed to bring the goods. Their stage show is upbeat, frenetic, engaging, and hard-rocking. For those of you not familiar with Zebrahead, here is a brief biography provided by Allmusic. Their assessment is fair and remarkably on-target, although whoever reviewed “Playmate of the Year” is something of a jagoff and dismisses the album’s validity and artistic merit a bit too hastily.

Anyhoo, Zebrahead has been one of my favorite bands for nearly ten years now, so I rarely miss an opportunity to see them in concert. Luckily, and to the surprise of many, Denver is a terrific punk rock town that many bands cite as one of their favorites to play. The fans here are rabid for their passions, and punk rock is no different. The crowds are always loud, always dancing, and always grateful for the efforts of their favorite performers. When Zebrahead does mini-tours, they usually hit Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Grand Junction, CO, and Denver.

I know what you’re thinking: “One of these things is not like the others, one of these things just doesn’t belong.” And in response to that, they have a friend who lives in Grand Junction whom they always like to visit, which has resulted in a surprisingly large fanbase in the small, dumpy, Western Colorado township. Weird, I know…

On this night, they play the Bluebird Theater – the smallest of three main Denver punk clubs, and the furthest from my house. The venue sits in East Denver, in not the friendliest of neighborhoods. The Bluebird actually used to be a porno theater which resulted in a comical exchange with an ex-girlfriend’s mother about where I was taking her daughter.

“You’re taking my daughter where?!”

Heh, good stuff. Regardless of its shady location and checkered history, I’ve always enjoyed the Bluebird. The sound is usually at least decent, the drink specials are top-notch, and balcony has tremendous sight lines. However, on this night, only the sight lines would live up to previous expectations. The rest of the show was somewhat disappointing on a number of levels.

Let’s start with the opening acts.

I’ve seen a lot of opening acts in my day, and Patent Pending was another one. That’s about all I can say for this band except that I’m pretty sure the lead guitarist just finished reading the book, hot off the best-seller list, The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Crowd Participation for Opening Acts. And if I had to guess, here’s how the chapter list might look:

Chapter 1: Invent a dumbass hand signal that invokes the local area code, and try to get the teenagers in front to do it.

Chapter 9: Failing Chapter 8, just pack it in and give up. Your band sucks.

I’ve never been to a show where one of the band members made so many goddamn requests. Put your hands up! Start a circle pit! Sing along! Jump up and down! Give it up for Zebrahead! Seriously, it was just one thing after another, and I started to think I was at a Catholic mass or something with all the instructions. Just shut the fuck up and play your music already. It was this kind of shit that really soured me on seeing Yellowcard when they started out. Just let your music speak for itself, and if you have to constantly resort to these cheap-ass gimmicks, maybe it’s time to either write better songs or think about a career as that guy in the clown makeup who badgers the crowd before monster truck rallies and rodeos.

The music itself was party rock in the same vein as Goldfinger or Diesel Boy. Although, to be perfectly honest I don’t really remember. The rest of their ancillary antics were too distracting.

Sure, this photo just LOOKS annoying. Imagine what it's like with audio accompaniment.

Tokyo Rose came on next. They played what I like to call “punk rock elevator music.” This is not to say that the music is slow or soft, but rather that there’s nothing memorable about it. It’s there. It happens. And afterward you don’t remember a goddamn thing about it. They had an Asian lead singer, which made the band name make sense in my head. I’m not sure if that’s racist, but if you took it that way, let me refer you to my previous work.

Hi, we're Tokyo Rose. Remember us? Nope? Alright then...

Authority Zero joined us next. I was actually excited for their set since I used to listen to them a lot in my radio hosting days. What I got was a big ol’ plate of surprise. The lead singer looked nothing like I pictured him (they never do), and they had far fewer instruments than I imagined. The way I like to categorize Authority Zero is what the Voodoo Glow Skulls might sound like if they lost all their horns and suddenly swapped out half of their DNA for the band H20. The lead singer looks a lot like Tim from Rise Against, and the band constructs songs that sound like they have three guitars. So to see only four guys onstage was a tad jarring.

This is where the sound issues of the night became really annoying. I knew a few of Authority Zero’s songs, but because whoever was running the audio board thought it necessary to really crank up the guitars and drown out the vocals, I couldn’t keep pace. The lead singer is furious as hell and did a crazy punk-style yodel that got faster with each turn. I hadn’t been paying attention for about 10 minutes, but the bizarre yodeling really caused me to turn around and take notice. His vocals are impressive, and his stage presence is exuberant. The problem was that the sound was mixed so poorly that it was tough to get into unless you really knew your Authority Zero material going in. I didn’t, so the set was only ok, not great.

For the last time, we're not Anti-Flag! We're Authority Zero! We don't even look like this normally!

Once Authority Zero finished, the balcony finally started to clear out as the Zebrahead fans made their way down to the pit level. The show previous to this point had the most packed balcony I’ve ever been a part of, a fact not helped by the only drink special being $3 High Life cans. High Life by itself is bad enough, but out of a can is almost undrinkable. I suppose I could have opted for the 5 dollar 25 oz. oil can of Foster’s, but have you ever tried to drink one of these things? I like Foster’s as much as anyone, but it’s not a beer you can drink rapidly. It’s fairly heavy, and whatever the hell that oil can is made of conducts heat like leather car upholstery on a hot day. By the time you’ve gotten to the bottom of your oil can, you no longer have a container of frosty, refreshing beer goodness, you’ve got a warm can of piss and backwash that you’re trying to choke down before you throw up so as not to waste your precious 5-spot. It’s profoundly unpleasant. As a result, I was living the High Life for the night.

The beer unpleasantness aside, Zebrahead came on and rocked the joint. They opened with “Rescue Me,” which is always a crowd favorite. It opens Zebrahead’s fourth album and is the perfect way to open a concert. It’s well-known, has a good chorus, and excellent pit potential. Zebrahead then launched into a slew of new material, which was fine with me since I hadn’t seen them perform it yet. The only problem was that I bought the new album in July at Warped Tour three months before it earned a wide release in the US. I’ve been listening to it fairly regularly ever since, so I wanted to rock out to some old stuff. I realized that most of the audience hadn’t heard the new album nearly as much, so it was necessary for Zebrahead to get them acclimated to it, and, more importantly, to help out their record sales. The best of the new songs is “Postcards from Hell” with probably my all-time favorite break-up line: “So thank you very little, and send me postcards from hell!”

This is not to say that Zebrahead didn’t throw in a few old jams to make the die-hards happy. “Jagoff” is an excellent bouncy tune, “Hello Tomorrow” is among the most sing-able of Zebrahead’s songs, and “Falling Apart” is a good, intense head-nodder. I’m definitely up on my Zebrahead lyrics, and with exception to the Mad Caddies and Less Than Jake, Zebrahead is a band that I can sing along to on virtually every song. But the audio problems continued as the guitars were way too loud, there wasn’t enough bass, and most importantly, the vocals were completely drowned out. It was difficult for even me to sing along to this set. The fault isn’t entirely with the audio techs because Zebrahead insisted on playing their already uptempo set about five clicks faster. I get why bands do this, but sometimes enough is enough and it’s time just to play your shit at normal speed. People like to sing along.

The set closed with “Playmate of the Year” as it always does, and if you’ve ever heard a Zebrahead song, it’s probably this one. Good crowd participation in this one that you have to be a part of to appreciate. The encore featured more from the newest album, which was disappointing. Don’t break in new shit at the very end of the show. Everyone wants to hear “I’m Money” and “Get Back.” Send the crowd home happy and stop pimping your new album. Chances are excellent we all either own it, bought it at the show, or will buy it shortly. There’s no need for the continued hard sell. You’ve already won us over, now give us what we want, dammit!

That makes me sound more angry than I actually was, but I was disappointed that both “I’m Money” and “Get Back” did not make the set list. These two songs are two of the most fun in Zebrahead’s catalog, and would have served as the perfect finale for a mildly disappointing night. Zebrahead is an excellent band, but I’ve seen them rock the house with much more authority than they did on this evening. The good news is that they’ll be back soon enough (and hopefully at a larger venue), and I’m sure the vaguely sour taste of this show will soon wash away to be replaced by the sweet nectar of punk rock MFZB style!

Mutha' Fuckin' Zebrahead Bitch!

The Bottom Line: Mediocrity abounds in this show. The opening bands were definitely Grade A filler material, Authority Zero had a hard time overcoming the venue’s audio shortcomings, and Zebrahead’s hard sell of the new album was annoying. A crowded balcony and shitty drink specials didn’t help matters. Zebrahead is always highly recommended, especially if you’ve never seen them. Patent Pending and Tokyo Rose can look forward to a nice career in the opening slot. Authority Zero is a band I’d like to give another chance to. Overall, this was a fairly disappointing night considering how many times Zebrahead has blown me away. I guess they can’t ALL be winners…